Sometimes even though we can see the signs that are telling us to run to turn right, we still take the left path. We know we shouldn’t, we can see the birds singing and the little chipmunks dancing around on the right path and yet we trudge on down the left, why?
Why can’t we let go of things that are clearly bad for us or just things that no longer make us happy?
Take for example, smoking. We know we shouldn’t smoke, it’s unhealthy it makes you feel bad, you hurt those around you with second hand smoke. Ask most smokers and they will even admit that they don’t want to smoke, or wish they never started. So why do they? It’s just habit. They always reach for that cigarette after a good romp in the sack, or with their morning coffee. That habit turns into an addiction and they’re hooked.
For whatever reason humans seem to feel guilty about everything! We feel guilty for being sad, guilty for being happy, guilty for eating that last cupcake. mmmMMMmmm cupcake. Unfortunately I’m not an exception to this rule. My main reason for not letting go in the past has been guilt. I would love to be able to jump into a project and say to hell with the rest of it, but I don’t want to let others down.
In the case of my web site I didn’t want to close and let down those members who have stuck around for years. I didn’t want others to think badly about me. (Yet another thing I need to let go of, other’s opinions!) Women especially seem to feel guilty whenever they do anything for themselves even if by doing so it will help others. Such as taking time in the day to go for a walk or exercise, though it makes us more healthy and able to look after our family we find it hard to take that time for ourselves because of the time that is taken away from them. Weird right?
No matter what it’s going to hurt. Fact. Whether it’s a little twinge or a bottomless pit of darkness there will be pain. Sometimes we hold on to protect ourselves from the hurt that will come.
Letting go of those things we think we hold most dear is scary, no matter how big or little.
We all have one thing in common, we want to be happy. We strive for it and pin that happiness to people, things, jobs etc. If I get this job I’ll be happy, this person will make me happier … likewise if I lose my job I will be unhappy, if this person leaves me my world will end. We’re so sure that what we have is what makes us happy that it then becomes to hard for us to let it go because even if we slowly become unhappy with the job or person or thing we feel as though it will be worse without them.
No matter what it is you’re trying to let go of, the past, people, things it’s not easy and it’s not painless. It’s also something best done actively. By which I mean you want to be the one doing it, you don’t want to let go of something because you have no other choice, or because you’ve backed yourself into a corner. It will be much easier for all of us to let go when we’re the ones making the choice.
I put it out to my readers. What do you need to let go of? Is it a nick nack? A friend who isn’t really a friend? The past? What’s stopping you. Now, what’s really stopping you. Then what steps are you willing to take to let go and move on?